It's been four years since I've started writing this blog. Normally, I like looking back on how much things have changed. That's easy to do when the changes are good (better writing, better content) but what happens when the changes are bad? What happens when you face yourself with a situation that makes you question whether you're on the right path or not? That's the situation I find myself in today.
The world's crazy; the president of the United States of America is a Reality TV star who filed for bankruptcy 6 times, the United Kingdom is leaving the European Union, ISIS is still causing quite the crisis, and climate change is getting worse by the day. Nationalism is on the rise in Europe and the US is as imperialistic as ever. Life is getting worse, it seems. And what are we doing?
Gaming. We're gaming. It's almost a joke, really. The world burns around us, and we're worried about fucking pixels. People younger than me are worried about real things like feeding their children, keeping their families safe and protected. CHILDREN live in constant fear of getting shelled and bombarded, of going hungry, getting sick and having no medicine. And here I am, writing about VIDEO GAMES! Fucking video games...
I look back at GamerGate. Back in those days, I worried about limousine socialists using their positions as game journalists to get away with their utterly reprehensible behavior. I thought censorship was a big deal (deleting mass a bunch of threads on Reddit discussing thezoepost), but these days, I look back on that not with a wistful sigh ("how simpler things were back then!") but with a tired, gruff, angered sigh ("in hindsight, it wasn't even that big a deal.") I guess what I'm trying to say is: I'm tired. I'm very, very tired.
I've been thinking a lot lately. Is any of this worth the effort we're putting into it? Is it worth fighting to have "better representation" in games for non-whites, non-Japanese, and women? In a world where we are being force fed the threat of Islamism, viral diseases, and the so-called nuclear threat of North Korea, it seems almost ridiculous to so much as entertain the idea that we need to waste time and energy debating whether a video game character is trans or not, on the feminist value of Lara Croft, or any other topic of that nature.
There's this scene in Watchmen, where The Comedian sets fire to this map drawn by Captain Metropolis, who was trying to start up a new team of crime fighters. He made the argument that stopping purse snatchers didn't matter much at a time when the world was one button push away from nuclear Armageddon. That's how I feel right now: why am I even talking about video games, or even playing video games, when the world is going crazy around me?
I guess that this is my way to distract myself from how utterly powerless I am to do anything of value. I mean, what the hell can I do? Not a damn thing. So why not just write about video games?
It's a real defeatist attitude right there. Or maybe it's realist? I have no idea.
But you know what's ridiculous? We're all going to die one day. Maybe we'll die by nuclear warhead. Maybe we'll die in a fire. Some of us might even get to die of old age, if we're so privileged! And what do we do in the meantime? What are we SUPPOSED to do?
I don't know, no one knows, and everyone who claims to know is full of shit. The truth is that life is meaningless; any "meaning" you think is there is just the one you unconsciously (or consciously) give it. If so, why are we so worried?
There's scant else we can do for the world, and it doesn't do to carry that burden on our shoulders. Focus instead of what you CAN do to make the world a little bit better. Be charitable. Be kind to others. Share whatever you deem worth sharing. Make people laugh. And so on.
Also, don't forget to take care of yourself. Go on. Laugh. Sing. Be gay (in all meanings of the term). LIVE your life, do what YOU think is worth doing. If not, do what you ENJOY doing. And that's what I'll do. I'll continue writing.
Not because I think it does anything, not because I think what I'm doing has any importance (or lacks it), but because I genuinely enjoy writing. And if you enjoy reading my works, then hey. Thanks. I mean it.
In these trying times, what other words need to be echoed, if not CARPE DIEM?
I've been thinking a lot lately. Is any of this worth the effort we're putting into it? Is it worth fighting to have "better representation" in games for non-whites, non-Japanese, and women? In a world where we are being force fed the threat of Islamism, viral diseases, and the so-called nuclear threat of North Korea, it seems almost ridiculous to so much as entertain the idea that we need to waste time and energy debating whether a video game character is trans or not, on the feminist value of Lara Croft, or any other topic of that nature.
There's this scene in Watchmen, where The Comedian sets fire to this map drawn by Captain Metropolis, who was trying to start up a new team of crime fighters. He made the argument that stopping purse snatchers didn't matter much at a time when the world was one button push away from nuclear Armageddon. That's how I feel right now: why am I even talking about video games, or even playing video games, when the world is going crazy around me?
I guess that this is my way to distract myself from how utterly powerless I am to do anything of value. I mean, what the hell can I do? Not a damn thing. So why not just write about video games?
It's a real defeatist attitude right there. Or maybe it's realist? I have no idea.
But you know what's ridiculous? We're all going to die one day. Maybe we'll die by nuclear warhead. Maybe we'll die in a fire. Some of us might even get to die of old age, if we're so privileged! And what do we do in the meantime? What are we SUPPOSED to do?
I don't know, no one knows, and everyone who claims to know is full of shit. The truth is that life is meaningless; any "meaning" you think is there is just the one you unconsciously (or consciously) give it. If so, why are we so worried?
There's scant else we can do for the world, and it doesn't do to carry that burden on our shoulders. Focus instead of what you CAN do to make the world a little bit better. Be charitable. Be kind to others. Share whatever you deem worth sharing. Make people laugh. And so on.
Also, don't forget to take care of yourself. Go on. Laugh. Sing. Be gay (in all meanings of the term). LIVE your life, do what YOU think is worth doing. If not, do what you ENJOY doing. And that's what I'll do. I'll continue writing.
Not because I think it does anything, not because I think what I'm doing has any importance (or lacks it), but because I genuinely enjoy writing. And if you enjoy reading my works, then hey. Thanks. I mean it.
In these trying times, what other words need to be echoed, if not CARPE DIEM?
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